Douglas E. Berry

It took three years, but it was mostly worth the wait.

I'm a Metalhead. I have been since 1983. I love almost all forms of the genre, so to see a TTRPG dedicated to the concept of a freewheeling, horns-flashing, headbanging game made me happy to back the Kickstarter.

Let's pretend we're all at a late-night restaurant after a show, sharing french fries and ranch dressing—first, the complaints.

The game is jargon-heavy. Successes are "Tributes," for example. Several important concepts are buried in the text. I had to keep flipping back to the glossary to comprehend the rule I was reading. The rules could be slightly better organized. Many simple proofreading and editing errors should have been caught in the layout process. Each of the six Metal Gods gets a single "art page" describing them and their goals. One of them is cut off mid-sentence. Later in the book, extraneous letters and odd cuts appear. I get meeting an already blown shipping date, but two extra pairs of eyes and one week of rewriting would have fixed these issues.

Now the things that make us throw up the horns, sing along, and get thrown out of Denny's at 3 A.M.

The tone of the writing and the artwork all build the setting and feel of Ragnarock perfectly. One of my early misconceptions was this was a game about being a metal band in Ragnarock. No, this is about being fucking Metal Demigods in Ragnarock. If this means your Avatar is Hammerhead Türzertrümmerer, who literally has a giant hammer for a head and two giant fucking Teutonic hammers for hands? Go for it!

Attributes and Skills are combined. For example, our friend Hammerhead should put some points in Brute if he wants to break down doors. You also choose a Metal God and a Tone. I'll detail character generation later because it is an adventure in itself, and yes, you can die during character generation.

The world-building requires two encores because there are two worlds. Mundania, where all of us Work Units (formerly known as People) are trapped, and Raganrock, where a few lucky souls can escape to fight the good fight. Your mortal body is still in Mundania, filling out TPS reports or stamping passports or whatever soul-destroying job the Executors and Upper Management have bestowed on you. They desire absolute obedience and conformity. Think of the worst dystopian SF you've ever read or seen. The Adjustment Bureau. Matrix Revolutions without the happy ending. A Stalinist gray wasteland if Stalin and J.P. Morgan joined forces.

But you have escaped, been drawn to the Spiral Umbilical, and if you survived. . . welcome to the party, pal!

So, there will be a second reading in the near future. I'll run my idea for a character through the introductory adventure, which is also an ideal Session Zero and character-building exercise.

What do I want? Aside from a corrected book. . .

• A proper atlas and gazetteer of Ragnarok.
• A handout of the basic creation myth.
• The Spiral Umbilical adventure as a download.

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Update from kshandra, 23 Nov 2023: One of the mutual friends Doug and I had through social media is laurenthemself, who among other things works with Ivan Van Norman, the man behind Gods of Metal. I can't find the comment currently, but they promised that they would hold a ceremonial bonfire and "send" Doug a copy of the errata that way. That's metal AF, if you ask me.

Last night kshandra and I drove up to San Francisco to see Metallica celebrate its 40th anniversary. For the most part, it was a great show. For the most part.

Then there was the opening act. DJ Lord and Dean Delray, an alleged comedian. Both failed utterly to engage the audience. Delray just sounded desperate, tone-deaf, and suffered from terrible timing and a lack of ability to read the room. DJ Lord was at least really talented, but again, read the room. It wasn't until he played Pantera's Walk that the crowd got into it.

We had a blast, and I loved the setlist. But there we so many technical glitches and sound flubs. Kirk's guitar was mixed way too low for most of the show, and it seemed that the vocal mikes were all set to different volume levels. So we missed about half of James' vocals, especially in the later portions of the show.

One really cool thing s was everyone got these bracelets with lights in them. We became part of the light show in several songs.

But we had a great time, and I got my King Nothing and fucking Fixxxer. The only thing that marred our enjoyment were the three drunk kids right in front of us in Section 217. Chase Center was built with incredible sightlines, and if you're up in the upper deck, you can see clearly from your seat. These yahoos, two guys and a young woman, kept standing up and blocking the view of everyone around them. They were literally the only people I could see in the upper deck sections doing this. Then the girl started giving her boyfriend lapdances. During the convert.

Guys, if you want to act like you have floor tickets, pay for them.

Hit the Lights
Creeping Death
Trapped Under Ice (First time live since June 23, 2012)
Welcome Home (Sanitarium)
Orion
The Shortest Straw
One
Sad but True
King Nothing
Fixxxer(Live debut)
Breadfan (Budgie cover)
No Leaf Clover
Frantic
The Day That Never Comes
Spit Out the Bone

They played what felt like an arena show in a medium-sized venue.

I just got an email announcing that Levi's now has a Grateful Dead collection.

Feel free to laugh, roll your eyes, or rant about how the band was so much better when Keith was still around.

Finished? Cool.

But there's one thing in this overpriced, really-does-not-get-it, collection that made me laugh.

Some of the stuff features the phrase "Who Are The Grateful Dead And Why Are They Following Me?" I was watching when that, I guess you could call it a meme, was born. It was during one of the New Year's Eve shows that got telecast. During the shows leading up to New Year, a camera crew had gone around the Oakland Arena asking Deadheads for their best questions to ask the band. They showed the best responses to the guys and taped their responses live, and played it between sets.

It was hysterical. One guy asked what Jerry would be wearing for the NYE show. Jerry Garcia notoriously wore the same t-shirt and jeans on stage for about five years. So Bob Weir begins describing it like some big fashion statement. At which point Phil Lesh said, "The only other option is the Aztec Sun God outfit." to which one of the band members said, "but everyone's seen that."

But then came Gus. Gus managed to kill the band.

"Hi, my name is Gus, and I want to know, who are the Grateful Dead and why do they keep following me?"

The band howled with laughter, shouting they were onto Gus, and then Mickey Hart saying, "Guys, he's seen us!"

It was a great bit.

By the Chinese New Year shows we were seeing bumper stickers with Gus' immortal question on it. Patches soon followed, and now Levi's is using it.

Gus, my friend, wherever you are, you gotta keep on truckin' on.

Can y'all stand another whiny birthday post?

For a very long time, I had one must-do thing on my birthday. That was watching the Boston Pops Esplanade perform. It started when I was eight or nine, we were at a party at the house of some friends of my parents, and I was bored. . . except for the big beautiful parrot that took a liking to me. That was cool.

Anyway, in one room there was a group watching this concert on TV. I sat down to watch because music is always good. I had fun with the patriotic sing-along, then the orchestra started another piece, and the cameras kept cutting to Army howitzers with army guys around them. Now, this was something different!

I asked one of the grown-ups about the cannon, and he explains what the 1812 Overture was, and that near the end Tchaikovsky wrote in parts for cannon fire. Now I was hooked! The music was awesome, and they kept showing those cannons!

Then it happened. In the fury of the "Battle of Borodino" passage, the cannons started firing! As an army-mad kid, this was the BEST THING EVER!

Then, before my pulse rate has a chance to return to normal, the Pops go right into "The Stars and Stripes Forever." I might have heard Sousa before, but never like this! And the flag drop! If you have never seen the Pos perform this march, near the end, just before the finale, a giant US flag unfurls over the orchestra. Then fireworks!

I was hooked. Every year my one birthday demand was seeing the Boston Pops. Luckily, no one complained, and it was on PBS. (I think KQED carried it.) I watched it every year until I left for the Army. In a funny twist, I spent my 19th birthday marching in Columbus, Ga. to The Stars and Stripes Forever! If it's fun to watch, it's ten times more fun to match to with your M-16A1 at port arms.

But then things changed. The broadcast was moved, first to Bravo, then to one of the Networks. They began cutting it to pieces and putting chattering talking heads over the music. They never showed the whole 1812, which sucks because that piece tells a story. I finally gave up when I saw that they had cut the six-hour concert to a one-hour highlight reel.

This year, it's supposed to be streamed on Bloomberg. I need to sit with Kirsten to see if we can even get that on the TV. Because I want my tradition back!

Confess: The Autobiography by Rob Halford

My rating: 5 of 5 stars


Rob Halford, the Metal God. The electric frontman of Judas Priest set the style and tone of heavy metal for decades. Possessing a four-octave vocal range and magnificent stage presence, we all wanted to be Rob Halford.

As it turns out, we should be happy we weren't him. In Confess, Halford presents an honest, detailed story of his life from his roots in the Black Country of England to the heights of fame and beyond. But this isn't a typical take of rock and roll excess, because Halford is also gay, a fact that he felt he had to hide from the world, lest he destroy Judas Priest.

This is an incredibly personal book that shows how complex a life can be. Halford can point to the ferocious fights between his parents as the source of his fear of conflict while expressing his deep love for both of them. He is open about his struggles with drugs and alcohol without making excuses. His tales of failed relationships and anonymous sexual encounters are presented simply as what he experienced as a deeply closeted gay man.

We also get a good amount of detail on Judas Priest from the time he joined to today. Reading about how the albums were created (British Steel, possibly one of the great metal albums of all time, was 30 days from start to finish) along with stories from the road round out the story of the Metal God portion of his life. His accidental resignation from Priest, solo career, and reintroduction to the band are all covered in depth.

What you end up with is a complete portrait of a very private man. The title is very apt. This is Rob Halford's confession to his followers, and we are all better off for reading this. As I just told my wife, after reading this, I just want to give Halford a hug. I've been a Priest fanatic since 1983, seen them several times, but I don't want an autograph or selfie, I just want to hug him and tell him that I've been clean for 33 years myself.

It's that kind of book.



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I made an iTunes Genius playlist based on Black Sabbath's I. It turned out to be a really good one.

( Good classic metal! )

In happier news, I was listening to Ozzy's Boneyard on SiriusXM as I ran my errands. I caught Anthrax's Caught in a Mosh as I hit the onramp to SR17S. The bass line hit just as I accelerated to warp speed.

Did you know a 2008 Ford Ranger can hit 85mph? The guy in the Porche I blew the doors off of looked pissed.

In 2018 Avatar released its seventh studio album Avatar Country, a sort of concept album about a mythical heavy metal nation. A companion film was recently released, chronicling the was between Avatar Country and an evil nation dedicated to Electronic Dance Music.

You really should watch it, it's fun. But be sure to watch the video for A Statue of the King immediately after, as it should have been the ending of the movie.

But enough about that. There's one song on the album, King After King that struck me as a great basis for a fantasy RPG campaign. Let's look at the lyrics, shall we?

The last spoken will of a warrior King:
"Bury me next to my soldiers
Set my horse free and let people sing
Of their son with the world on his shoulders
Then look to the mountains
I left my grave wide open."
Eyes fixed on the mountains
"I was buried at dusk, at dawn I'll return."

Here it comes
Death undone
King after King

From this tomb we shall build you a throne
In your name we shall sing
Light your torch, let the flames lead you home
Long live the King!

OK, a great start. a heroic warrior king is struck down and tells his followers that he will return at dawn. Let's take some license with that. After all, a king who comes back after a good night's rest isn't much of a legend.

The heart of a King can be measured in dreams
Reaching the sleep of his people
A whisper of ghost saying we'll be redeemed
From our sins he will build us a castle
One day we'll be stronger, we will ride right beside you
Until we are stronger, we put stone upon stone
Await your return

Here we go! The dead king is reaching out, calling his people to . . . build? Fight on? The call to grow stronger so that when the king returns his people will ride beside him.

The longing for sun and a heartbreak undone
Breaking the back of false idols
Bring our King home, for among us are none
Who is worthy to be his disciple
Out there in the wasteland, there's something coming for us
A call from the wasteland:
He was buried at dusk, at dawn he returns

There it is. The King fell battling a menace, and since his death, the sun has vanished and the world is a wasteland. And something is coming. We need to find out how to bring the King back, for he is the child of the Sun God, and since the other gods have fled (the "breaking the back of false idols" line)the world needs heroes to step up, face the threat, and brave death itself to bring back the King and bring the dawn!

I could write this up as a full level 1-20 campaign, starting with defending a city, then scouting and fighting the enemy, to greater quests for information and artifacts, and finally, awakening the Sun King and saving the world!

This would be like the old Dark Sun campaign setting; a dim star burning like a coal, widespread food shortages, gold is no longer worth much. Also, there would be severe restrictions on clerics in the beginning. Probably no more than 5th level until quests have been completed to begin bringing on the dawn.

I have time, I might start doodling this up.

Glory to our king
Our lord
The master of steel
Glory to our knight in shining armor
Long live our king
My lord
We raise our swords
The legend has come true
You've come to save us