"I'll get you my pretty, and your little dog Toto too!"

[gridlore]

Another great rant from the wilds of Usenet!



WICKED WITCHES ARE PLANNEING THE THEFT OF HUMAN FEMALE BODIES IN 2006!


YOU SHOULD GET A DREAM ABOUT THIS!

THERE IS A WAY TO PROTECT YOUR BODY, GIRLS! PLEASE LISTEN TO THIS MESSAGE!

IN 2006, WICKED WITCHES ARE PLANNING THE OUTRIGHT THEFT OF HUMAN FEMALE BODIES!

GO AND WATCH THE MOVIES

1. BEING JOHN MALKOVICH
2. FREAKY FRIDAY
3. INVASION OF THE BODY SNATCHERS

TO FURTHER YOUR UNDERSTANDING THAT A PHYSICAL BODY IS NOT IMPORTANT - WHAT IS REALLY IMPORTANT IS THE MIND INSIDE THE BODY AND THE MINDS INSIDE BODIES CAN BE "THROWN OUT" OF THE BODY AND A 'NEW MIND' BE INSERTED IN! THIS IS WHAT WICKED WITCHES ARE PLANNING TO DO IN 2006!

GIRLS THIS IS WHAT YOU WILL HAVE TO DO TO PROTECT YOURSELF / YOUR PHYSICAL BODY!

1. GO AND PURCHASE OR GET 'THE STAR OF DAVID' FROM A MALL OR ANYWHERE! PLEASE DO NOT THINK YOU HAVE TO BE 'JEWISH' TO WEAR THIS - IT IS A PROTECTION IN THE SPIRIT WORLD (THE DREAMWORLD) WHEN YOU SLEEP - YOUR 'DREAMBODY' IS BEING PROTECTED WHILE YOU WEAR IT. THE STAR OF DAVID IS LIKE 'LIGHT' IN THE DREAMING AND WICKED WITCHES ARE AFRAID OF IT!

2. AFTER YOU BUY IT, WASH IT WITH WATER, THEN WEAR IT - IF YOU CAN'T WEAR IT ALL DAY ATLEAST WEAR IT WHILE YOU SLEEP - THIS IS ACTUALLY WHEN YOUR BODY IS TAKEN - VIA THE DREAMWORLD!

3. PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR DREAMS FOR FURTHER INSTRUCTION!!!!!!!

REMEMBER, 'THE BEST DEFENSE IS AWARENESS'

"THE DREAMWORLD IS THE SPIRITWORLD"
PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR DREAMS!

Great Ghu, but I love alt.conspiracy!

Comments

[valkyrwench.livejournal.com]

Is this person serious?

Oy.

[robertprior.livejournal.com]

Possibly. I knew a woman who believed that the Pope had been persecuting her family for generations, through his tool the Jesuits. It was proved by the colour purple, you see.

Some people are just nuttier than a fruitcake.

[benkenobigal.livejournal.com]

Thanks for a great laugh, sniper! Just wish I hadn't snorted Diet Pepsi up my nose to stop from spewing on the monitor...

[isomeme.livejournal.com]

Nothing like being late to the party. The wicked witches will have slim pickings of young female bodies in 2006 after the Bavarian Illuminati implement their own 2005 plan. Mwah ha ha.

[shanex.livejournal.com]

This wicked witch can have my body any day she wants!

http://www.ozf5.com/gallery/jp1.html

-ATW

[pauldrye.livejournal.com]

Why is "Jewish" in quotes? Or is that a whole 'nother rant...er, explanation?

[gridlore.livejournal.com]

I'm afraid to ask, personally.

He might be one of those morons who claims that the majority of the Jews in the world today aren't really Jewish. Or he could be addicted to odd punctuation.

[twfarlan.livejournal.com]

Yes, girls, by all means, protect yourself. Meanwhile, I'll go convince the witches to take over the government, instead. Sheesh.

Oh come on, it's a great idea. I mean, Shrub and his ilk harm how many people a day? All those wicked witches would want would be a couple of fat children every couple of weeks. Plus firewood, naturally. (snork)

[melyxa.livejournal.com]

Oy. As a Jew and a Witch, where does one start with something like this? *sigh* Is this person really for real? And people, even wicked witches, who could take peoples' bodies over while they sleep wouldn't be taking over the government or the army or something? Just pretty women? Is this a teaser for a going-directly-to-video B-Movie? Some drug induced attempt to add a plotline to a porno film ("we had to screw the girls to save them" or, worse, you can tell that they're possessed by all the "wicked" things they're now willing to do...ugh)? Somebody skipped a groove in the post election depression, perhaps. Maybe they need our sympathy and aid.

On the other hand, maybe I'm one of the wicked witches you need to be careful of. Bwahahahah!

[gridlore.livejournal.com]

alt.conspiracy attracts lunatics. (alt.atheism as well, but they are mostly the type who scream "Jesus told you're all goi9ng to Hell!")

We get the people who refuse to believe that a plane hit the Pentagon. Who actually believe that Jews run everything and the Holocaust was faked. We have a regular who is obsessed with the masons. He makes dozens of posts every day detailing how evil and awful Freemasonry is, and how it is Taking Over The Earth.

I just like to share the better rants with y'all.

[melyxa.livejournal.com]

Oh, this sounds like too much fun to be legal. Please continue to share. I love it when my usual paranoia seems so low-key, understated and boring.

Freemasonry is taking over the Earth, huh? Well... can't do me any harm. I still haven't received any of my kickbacks from the Jewish world conspiracy, so it's not like I'll be losing any much needed income or anything. They can have it. *giggle*

[10binary-cats.livejournal.com]

Freemasons. pah. bunch of (as the governator would put it) girly-girls. Its the Freecarpenters you have to watch.

[gridlore.livejournal.com]

Actually it's the Egg Board.

The sane members of alt.conspiracy will occasionally go off on the loons with out claims about the evil plans of the Egg Board, and their archrivals, the British Dental Association. There are enough Illuminati and INWO players to make for some fun threads.

[melyxa.livejournal.com]

The... Egg Board? Ohhhhh... *knowing look* You really don't wanna mess with them...

[melyxa.livejournal.com]

Gee... I've never heard of them so they must be dangerous.

*lol*