Counting my pocket change..
Aug. 12th, 2003 09:48 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
gridloreposted to sjgames.fnord:
During the latest house-cleaning of the Gog-Magog Deep Crustal Facility, we have discovered a number of surplus, unclaimed, items. These will now be auctioned off to the highest bidders. Any items still unclaimed by the deadline will be marked with the sign of Baphomet and de-sanctioned by white-robed chanting priests in accordance with Directive
SDJVG-48534b161.68/21#00
Items for auctioning:
The left arm of the Venus di Milo
An animated replica in 1:1.16 scale of Charles Thorne, state governor of Nebraska 1979-83
3 vials of phlogiston
The head of a byakhee
A sock, once belonging to George Washington
An imitation kangaroo
7 Elvises (assorted)
A metallic object of uncertain provenance, approx. 7x5 inches
The first draft of the British North America Act of 1867
A ham sandwich stamped '11th century BC'
Five 10" panels of cavorite (slightly soiled)
A copy of the Times newspaper dated 20th April 1653
A map of Cimmeria tagged 'for disinformation purposes only'
The secret diary of Pitt the Younger
12,764 gallons of elephant grease
The original design specs of the Hanging Gardens of Babylon
The original design specs of the Estonian parliament building
Peter Mandelson
The lower half of a quantum stabilizer
Full security pass for the White House (valid for May 1965)
Nine and a half
A suspended animation chamber containing the buttocks of Sir Robert Walpole
A perfectly ordinary unicycle
An exact molecular copy of the original Constitution of Ecuador
A punnet of coin-operated tomatoes
Bids to be directed to this office and received no later than Deva Madha
Pirantha Naal. Further information upon properly
--
THE CONSPIRACY CLEARING & DISPATCH CENTRE
DEPARTMENT OF OBFUSCATION, STORAGE & IMPLAUSIBLE REQUISITIONING
beneath Mark Lane tube station, LONDON
During the latest house-cleaning of the Gog-Magog Deep Crustal Facility, we have discovered a number of surplus, unclaimed, items. These will now be auctioned off to the highest bidders. Any items still unclaimed by the deadline will be marked with the sign of Baphomet and de-sanctioned by white-robed chanting priests in accordance with Directive
SDJVG-48534b161.68/21#00
Items for auctioning:
The left arm of the Venus di Milo
An animated replica in 1:1.16 scale of Charles Thorne, state governor of Nebraska 1979-83
3 vials of phlogiston
The head of a byakhee
A sock, once belonging to George Washington
An imitation kangaroo
7 Elvises (assorted)
A metallic object of uncertain provenance, approx. 7x5 inches
The first draft of the British North America Act of 1867
A ham sandwich stamped '11th century BC'
Five 10" panels of cavorite (slightly soiled)
A copy of the Times newspaper dated 20th April 1653
A map of Cimmeria tagged 'for disinformation purposes only'
The secret diary of Pitt the Younger
12,764 gallons of elephant grease
The original design specs of the Hanging Gardens of Babylon
The original design specs of the Estonian parliament building
Peter Mandelson
The lower half of a quantum stabilizer
Full security pass for the White House (valid for May 1965)
Nine and a half
A suspended animation chamber containing the buttocks of Sir Robert Walpole
A perfectly ordinary unicycle
An exact molecular copy of the original Constitution of Ecuador
A punnet of coin-operated tomatoes
Bids to be directed to this office and received no later than Deva Madha
Pirantha Naal. Further information upon properly
--
THE CONSPIRACY CLEARING & DISPATCH CENTRE
DEPARTMENT OF OBFUSCATION, STORAGE & IMPLAUSIBLE REQUISITIONING
beneath Mark Lane tube station, LONDON