I'll be here all week.

[gridlore]

One day the zoo-keeper noticed that the orangutan was reading two books - the Bible and Darwin's The Origin of Species. In surprise he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books"? "Well," said the orangutan, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother's keeper or my keeper's brother."

And...

Did you hear about the biologist who had twins? She baptized one and kept the other as a control.

Another I like...

A man, complaining of headaches, entered a hospital for diagnostic tests. A doctor examined the results for a brain scan and told the patient, "I have bad news and good news for you. The bad news is that you have a serious brain disease and will die without treatment. The good news is that this hospital has developed a new procedure for brain transplants and due to a car accident this morning two 'fresh' brains are available: one is from a theologian and the other is from a scientist. The brain of the theologian costs $225,000, while that of the scientist is only $29.95." Puzzled, the patient asked, "Why is the scientist's brain so much cheaper?" The doctor replied, "It's used."

Thank you, try the veal!

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Try your waitress, tip the veal...