Meme for you sir!

[gridlore]

Delivered by SLBM from benkenobigal's personal Ohio-class SSBN.


Part One - Names

1. What's a name you once wished you'd rather have? Beowulf. Seriously, I really got into epic poetry when I was 12 and Beowulf was my favorite. That it is also the name of a Larry Niven character is a bonus.
2. What is/are the ugliest name(s) you can think of? Clarence
3. What are the names of your pets? No pets, but my primary teddy bear is named Roadie.
4. What song is most about you? Supertramp - Dreamer
5. What would you name your kids? Boy: William Douglas Girl: Kayleigh (can't remember what middle name we picked.)
6. What would you name a ship you built? Terrapin Transit
7. If you wrote a book, what would it be called? The Vasty Deep
8. What is the name of your stuffed animals? Gah. All of them? Along with Roadie, I have penguins named Heckler & Koch. We literally have dozens of critters.
9. What are the names of your boobs (girls)? Your willy (boys)? I don't really name my body parts, as they rarely answer to voice commands.
10. Do you hate your middle name? Not at all!

Part Two - Have you ever...

11. Thrown up in public? Yup.
12. Eaten or drank anything spoiled? Oh, yeah.
13. Had a rip in your pants you didn't know about? Yeah. Not really a problem.
14. Tripped while checking someone out? Nope.
15. Had to pay for something you broke? Once. I was a klutz, and insisted on paying.
16. Nearly drowned? Yeah, in Victory Pond, Fort Benning. Swimming in BDUs and boots is freaking hard.
17. Passed out? Several times.
18. Had a crush on somebody NOT single? Yup.
19. Been stuck in the rain? I was in the infantry! Being stuck in the rain was a way of life!
20. Been attacked by an animal? Couple of times. Dogs, a deer, one alligator.
21. Caught people having sex? Yup. Bunkmate in the Army snuck his g/f into the barracks. As I was coming off 24 hours of duty, I was less than amused.
22. Fallen asleep while driving? Nope. Come close a few times.
23. Felt attracted to someone of the same sex? Yup.
24. Actually slipped on a banana peel? Sort of. The peel was in the garbage area of our mess hall, and the concrete was icy. So I don't know what caused me to slip.
25. Made a wish that came true? Sure.

Part Three - Complete The Sentence

26. I once had a dream I was kissing ... Isadora Duncan. It was a strange dream.
27. I'm only racist towards... Vilani. I'm not racist, but I do have my prejudices
29. I'd give anything to have sex with... No one. Sex isn't really part of my life anymore.
30. Nothing sucks more than having to... Admit that you have failed.
31. If I had six bucks I'd buy ... Chips and salsa.
32. It's hot. I should take off my ... Sweatshirt
33. It's always more fun if you ... Approach it with the right attitude (problem)
34. You can't eat steak without ... garlic bread and a good wine.
35. You better shut up before ... I get all Eleven-Bravo on your ass.
37. I really like you and everything ... but I'm a Vulcan. Call me in 6.5 years.
39. Dude! Where's my ... Royalty check?

Part Four - What would you do if..

40. A dirty old guy at the airport slaps your ass? Break his arm.
41. You witness somebody about to steal your car? Call 911, then run at them screaming. Get a good look.
42. You wake up with a billion spiders crawling all over you and your bed? Freak out badly.
43. You farted while giving a persuasive speech in class? Make a joke about it, working it into the theme of the speech.
44. The person you just kissed tells you they have oral herpes? Immediately have a double shot of very strong alcohol. Use it as a mouthwash.
45. A genie lets you have three wishes? (1) The next lottery ticket I purchase will be the sole winning ticket for that draw. (2) All my dental and periodontal issues be resolved immediately, completely, and without discomfort. (3) Any malicious or unintended negative consequences of my first two wishes be eliminated. Hey, I've been playing D&D for 30 years! I know how to word wishes!
46. The government allowed you to choose one thing to be made illegal and one thing to be legalized? Tobacco is placed on Schedule I as a drug unsuited for even medical use. Same sex and group marriages are legalized.
47. Britney Spears was at your front door asking for jumper cables? I'd help her out. I may think she's a brain-dead bimbo, but I'll give anyone a hand.
48. You had a time machine? Oh, so many choices! Assuming I'm going as a tourist/researcher; I'd probably pick the Battle of Hastings (1066CE) to see how King Harold really died. If I can engage in a little looting, hitting the Library at Alexandria before one of its burnings would be fun.

Part Five - Would You Rather

50. Would you rather find the cure for cancer or the cure for AIDS? We have cures for most cancers. Detection is the problem. So AIDS.
51. Would you rather have the power to fly, or the power to teleport? Teleportation seems to be more fun, especially if I get a cool "bamf" like Nightcrawler.
52. Would you rather have the power to see the future, or the power to record your dreams? I'd prefer to be a precog. I'd make a fortune on sports betting.
53. Would you rather be really skinny, or really fat? I am really skinny, and like it this way.
54. Would you rather be lost in a forest, or stuck in a box? Give me the woods.
55. Would you rather be in a drama movie, or a comedy? An epic drama.
56. Would you rather be in a hip hop video or a rock video? ROCK!
57. Would you rather have your birthday on Christmas Day, or on February 29th? 2/29. I love being weird.
58. Would you rather live in the sewer, or in Afghanistan? Afghanistan
59. Would you rather be in a mental institution or in a penitentiary? I'll take the bug house, thanks. Lighter security, in most cases.
60. Would you rather snow board or hang glide? Hang glide.
61. Would you rather be a ninja or a pirate? Ninja

Part Six - What's the FIRST thing that comes to your mind when you read the following words?

62. Courage: Life
63. Driver: My job
64. Yoga: Something I should do.
65. Bakery: Doughnuts
66. Roach: Coach
67. Mushroom: Mario Brothers
68. Sprung: Spring
70. Pythagorean: Angle

Part Seven - Miscellaneous

72. What is your definition of love? The state of not being able to imagine life without the object of desire.
73. What are you frightened of? Deep water.
74. Reveal a secret about you that nobody knows of, but type it in acronym form: ingtty
75. Close your eyes, turn around, and then open them. What do you see? A royal mess.
76. Were you too scared to do it? Too scared to do what?
77. Who or what is your worst enemy? The British Dental Association.
78: Who is the last person you hit? Seriously did damage to? A Neo-Nazi at Earth Day years ago.
79. If you had to be a chess piece, which piece would you be? A knight.
80. Name three people you know whose names begin with the last letter of your first name: I don't think i know three people whose names begin with S.
82. If you had to break one of your bones, which bone would it be? A rib. Heals quickly, and causes minor inconvenience at worst.

Part Eight - What Is Your Counter Argument?

83. "Guys want nothing but action." ~~> This is my shocked look.
84. "Only idiots watch The Simpsons." ~~> And I care why?
85. "Kentucky is way better than Cali." ~~> At least we can pronounce the entire state name.
87. "Alcohol is the answer to ALL your problems." ~~> No, it's a way to ignore your problems. In the morning, you'll be hungover and your problems will still be there.
89. "Music is stupid." ~~> As are sweeping generalizations.
90. "Your car sucks." ~~> OK, buy me a better one. Since you seem to be the one with a problem, you fix it.

Comments

[dalen-talas.livejournal.com]

Awesome names for a pair of penguins.

[notthebuddha.livejournal.com]

I would like to hear about the occasions with Victory Pond and the alligator. Especially if they were the same one!

[gridlore.livejournal.com]

The Victory Pond incident came while I was being trained to helocast (jump out of a hovering helicopter into water, then swimming to a Zodiac assault boat.) My legs cramped the moment I hit the very cold water, and wearing combat boots and BDUs, I wasn't very bouyant. I struggled for a minute, then signalled distress. Rescue boat grabbed me.

The alligator was in Florida, where we do swamp training. Little guy, maybe three feet long, but he shot out of the water and scared the shit out of me. All I saw was a lot of teeth.

[benkenobigal.livejournal.com]

Must admit I laughed to your answer to #40. Yeah, I can see you snapping his arm for that.

Wait a minute, wait a minute!!! #80?!?! You don't know anyone whose name begins with 'S'?!?! What am I, chopped liver???

[gridlore.livejournal.com]

With my horrible memnory for names, I have a real hard time remembering who people really are behind their LJ handles.

[firestrike.livejournal.com]

74. Spoilsport. But at least you gave an answer that was easy to translate.

[claidheamhmor]

Very interesting! I liked the way you carefully phrased your 3 wishes...