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Notice: Chauncey the Magical Capybara does not appear in this thrilling episode. The Management apologizes for your crushed hopes.
So there Penguin Boy was, two-thirds done with a day that had tested mind and taxed his body. Rolling along The Alameda in his faithful truck, Darby. When suddenly a brand-new Ford Mustang Shelby GT500 appears!. Gorgeous car. The Penguin Boy is rudely yanked from his impending midlife crisis! The driver of the car has thrown something out the window! Into Darby's bed! Penguin Boy checks and confirms. A Rockstar energy drink can, empty, has been thrown into Darby.
Darby is not a proper place to dispose of trash! Penguin Boy (who might have been riding a slight endorphin high from his workout) caught up the Shelby at the next light. Boldly, Penguin Boy lept from his truck, grabbed the offending can, and fired the can through the open passenger window of the Shelby. With a burst of Amazing Penguin Speed, back to the wheel just as the light changed.
The insidious Raging Doucehbag, who was shocked that someone in a Ford Ranger would disrespect him like this, races after Darby. Roaring engine and squealing tires. All so his top of the line muscle car could catch . . . a Ford Ranger. A car that will do 80 if you really need it, but will then sulk for a week and probably report you to Car Protective Services ("Show me on the Tonka toy how the bad man touched your gas pedal...") Remember, this car was brand new. Still had a temporary registration and the dealer card in the "Marine Sniper - Born To Hunt Humans" plate frame. (Penguin Boy was not impressed.) Those engines need to be broken in. At least a few hundred miles before you start really working them. Raging Douchebag evidently has a crush on someone at the dealership maintenance bay; because the way he drives, he'll be a regular.
Onward to the next light. Raging Douchebag does indeed catch our hero, and accidentally passes him. There was another white Ford Ranger on the road, and Raging Douchebag pulled up next to him at the light. Darby and Penguin Boy was a few cars back. He charged from his car to scream only then noticing it wasn't Penguin Boy. Face flushed as red as the Marine Corps flag, he looked around to find our hero. Who waved. Like this.
The light turned green, and the enraged Raging Douchebag burned rubber as he shot into the intersection. The intersection of El Camino Real and Benton Street. The intersection right in front of the Santa Clara Police Department's headquarters. The Shelby is fine car. He must have been doing 65 when two patrol cars lit him up.
Penguin Boy saluted his fellow sniper as he rolled past the scene, being sure to let the now-defeated Raging Douchebag know that in Penguin Boy's eyes, he's still number one.
The concludes another exciting adventure of penguin Boy! Bu sure to tune in next time, and always remember,what Chauncey the Magical Capybara says: "Αίμα! Αίμα για το αίμα ο Θεός!"
So there Penguin Boy was, two-thirds done with a day that had tested mind and taxed his body. Rolling along The Alameda in his faithful truck, Darby. When suddenly a brand-new Ford Mustang Shelby GT500 appears!. Gorgeous car. The Penguin Boy is rudely yanked from his impending midlife crisis! The driver of the car has thrown something out the window! Into Darby's bed! Penguin Boy checks and confirms. A Rockstar energy drink can, empty, has been thrown into Darby.
Darby is not a proper place to dispose of trash! Penguin Boy (who might have been riding a slight endorphin high from his workout) caught up the Shelby at the next light. Boldly, Penguin Boy lept from his truck, grabbed the offending can, and fired the can through the open passenger window of the Shelby. With a burst of Amazing Penguin Speed, back to the wheel just as the light changed.
The insidious Raging Doucehbag, who was shocked that someone in a Ford Ranger would disrespect him like this, races after Darby. Roaring engine and squealing tires. All so his top of the line muscle car could catch . . . a Ford Ranger. A car that will do 80 if you really need it, but will then sulk for a week and probably report you to Car Protective Services ("Show me on the Tonka toy how the bad man touched your gas pedal...") Remember, this car was brand new. Still had a temporary registration and the dealer card in the "Marine Sniper - Born To Hunt Humans" plate frame. (Penguin Boy was not impressed.) Those engines need to be broken in. At least a few hundred miles before you start really working them. Raging Douchebag evidently has a crush on someone at the dealership maintenance bay; because the way he drives, he'll be a regular.
Onward to the next light. Raging Douchebag does indeed catch our hero, and accidentally passes him. There was another white Ford Ranger on the road, and Raging Douchebag pulled up next to him at the light. Darby and Penguin Boy was a few cars back. He charged from his car to scream only then noticing it wasn't Penguin Boy. Face flushed as red as the Marine Corps flag, he looked around to find our hero. Who waved. Like this.
The light turned green, and the enraged Raging Douchebag burned rubber as he shot into the intersection. The intersection of El Camino Real and Benton Street. The intersection right in front of the Santa Clara Police Department's headquarters. The Shelby is fine car. He must have been doing 65 when two patrol cars lit him up.
Penguin Boy saluted his fellow sniper as he rolled past the scene, being sure to let the now-defeated Raging Douchebag know that in Penguin Boy's eyes, he's still number one.
The concludes another exciting adventure of penguin Boy! Bu sure to tune in next time, and always remember,what Chauncey the Magical Capybara says: "Αίμα! Αίμα για το αίμα ο Θεός!"
