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I swear to Halford, I almost went off.
Nov. 24th, 2012 05:49 pmNo shit, there I was...
After work today (and that was its own fiasco) I stopped by Safeway because I was craving Italian sausage sandwiches for dinner. Found what I needed, and with only three items, got in the express lane.
Behind the one human put on Earth to test me to the breaking point.
15 items or less, right? He had all fifteen... and coupon for each. None of which he met the standards for For example, coupon say X off when you buy three boxes of Spoo. He bought one. Argument. Takes spoo off ticket. Cashier voids. Next item, ineligible coupon, repeat.
He finally has about six things, cashier announces the total, and he pulls out a checkbook. A checkbook! It's 2012, people! Not only does he have a checkbook, he hasn't even bothered to pre-write things like the date or the payee. He then argues with the clerk over-writing the amount to get cash back. Assure clerk he's been there many times, and can get X amount. Writes check. As he's signing, the pen dies. Clerk offers a new one, blue instead of black.
Captain Slow (with apologies to James May) then dithers. should he just finish signing and initial the different ink color? No, he has to write a whole new check. By this time, our beleaguered clerk had called every available checker up, as the express line was no some ten people deep. I was wondering if I set fire to his pile of discarded coupons, would I be able to cook my sausages right there?
Finally, the check is written. Our long shopping nightmare is ove.. wait. The franking machine is rejecting it. Seem this dude lied about having a long check cashing history here. The cashier looks up from filling out his enlistment papers in the French Foreign Legion to direct the customer to the service desk. As he leaves, and I swear this was the moment when I truly understood the term "voluntary manslaughter", the guy says to no one in particular:
"Maybe I should have used my bank card."
Gee, YA THINK?
After work today (and that was its own fiasco) I stopped by Safeway because I was craving Italian sausage sandwiches for dinner. Found what I needed, and with only three items, got in the express lane.
Behind the one human put on Earth to test me to the breaking point.
15 items or less, right? He had all fifteen... and coupon for each. None of which he met the standards for For example, coupon say X off when you buy three boxes of Spoo. He bought one. Argument. Takes spoo off ticket. Cashier voids. Next item, ineligible coupon, repeat.
He finally has about six things, cashier announces the total, and he pulls out a checkbook. A checkbook! It's 2012, people! Not only does he have a checkbook, he hasn't even bothered to pre-write things like the date or the payee. He then argues with the clerk over-writing the amount to get cash back. Assure clerk he's been there many times, and can get X amount. Writes check. As he's signing, the pen dies. Clerk offers a new one, blue instead of black.
Captain Slow (with apologies to James May) then dithers. should he just finish signing and initial the different ink color? No, he has to write a whole new check. By this time, our beleaguered clerk had called every available checker up, as the express line was no some ten people deep. I was wondering if I set fire to his pile of discarded coupons, would I be able to cook my sausages right there?
Finally, the check is written. Our long shopping nightmare is ove.. wait. The franking machine is rejecting it. Seem this dude lied about having a long check cashing history here. The cashier looks up from filling out his enlistment papers in the French Foreign Legion to direct the customer to the service desk. As he leaves, and I swear this was the moment when I truly understood the term "voluntary manslaughter", the guy says to no one in particular:
"Maybe I should have used my bank card."
Gee, YA THINK?
