Friday Fiver jumps the shark

1. Have you ever been to the ocean? I live just over the mountains from the Pacific, so I spent a lot of my childhood in Santa Cruz freezing in the ocean. During my military service, I went to swim in the Gulf and Atlantic a great deal as well.

2. When is the last time you wore a swimsuit? Wow. I think it was last July when I went to San Diego for my training. Haven't had the chance to go swimming since then.

3. Do you respect people more for staying through difficult times or knowing when to call it quits? That's hard to answer, because it depends on the problem. I'd have to say I respect people who can make the call on when it is appropriate to drive on, as opposed to those who just plow ahead regardless of facts or those who quit too soon.

4. Name a TV show that made a huge splash in the beginning, but has since gone downhill: John Doe on Fox. Really interesting premise (a man wakes up on an island off Seattle, and can't remember who he is.. but he knows *everything else.* (In the pilot, he recites the binary code for MS-DOS.) The series was supposed to revolve around his search for who he is, but quickly dissolved into yet another crime drama. It was mercifully cancelled midway through the first season.

5. Have you ever eaten shark? Shark-fin soup, yes.

Veteran's Day

Considering the current administration's treatment of veterans, I figure this was appropriate for the day.

Tommy
by Rudyard Kipling

I went into a public-'ouse to get a pint o' beer,
The publican 'e up an' sez, "We serve no red-coats here."
The girls be'ind the bar they laughed an' giggled fit to die,
I outs into the street again an' to myself sez I:
O it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Tommy, go away";
But it's "Thank you, Mister Atkins", when the band begins to play,
The band begins to play, my boys, the band begins to play,
O it's "Thank you, Mister Atkins", when the band begins to play.

I went into a theatre as sober as could be,
They gave a drunk civilian room, but 'adn't none for me;
They sent me to the gallery or round the music-'alls,
But when it comes to fightin', Lord! they'll shove me in the stalls!
For it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Tommy, wait outside";
But it's "Special train for Atkins" when the trooper's on the tide,
The troopship's on the tide, my boys, the troopship's on the tide,
O it's "Special train for Atkins" when the trooper's on the tide.

Yes, makin' mock o' uniforms that guard you while you sleep
Is cheaper than them uniforms, an' they're starvation cheap;
An' hustlin' drunken soldiers when they're goin' large a bit
Is five times better business than paradin' in full kit.
Then it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Tommy, 'ow's yer soul?"
But it's "Thin red line of 'eroes" when the drums begin to roll,
The drums begin to roll, my boys, the drums begin to roll,
O it's "Thin red line of 'eroes" when the drums begin to roll.

We aren't no thin red 'eroes, nor we aren't no blackguards too,
But single men in barricks, most remarkable like you;
An' if sometimes our conduck isn't all your fancy paints,
Why, single men in barricks don't grow into plaster saints;
While it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Tommy, fall be'ind",
But it's "Please to walk in front, sir", when there's trouble in the wind,
There's trouble in the wind, my boys, there's trouble in the wind,
O it's "Please to walk in front, sir", when there's trouble in the wind.

You talk o' better food for us, an' schools, an' fires, an' all:
We'll wait for extry rations if you treat us rational.
Don't mess about the cook-room slops, but prove it to our face
The Widow's Uniform is not the soldier-man's disgrace.
For it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' "Chuck him out, the brute!"
But it's "Saviour of 'is country" when the guns begin to shoot;
An' it's Tommy this, an' Tommy that, an' anything you please;
An' Tommy ain't a bloomin' fool -- you bet that Tommy sees!

To all my fellow vets, thank you.

Douglas Berry, US Army. Son, grandson, and great-grandson of Tommies, and a proud Dogface.