gridlore: One of the "Madagascar" penguins with a checklist: [x] cute [x] cuddly [x] psychotic (Penguin - Checklist)
2012-03-12 09:20 am
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I'm in the mood for a little road trip...

http://g.co/maps/rvp9f

Take a week, and drive across the country. Sounds good to me.
gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Me - Glare of Sarcasm)
2012-02-24 07:41 pm
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Hell is other people.

A question, my dear readers. Say you needed to know the long-term parking rates at an airport. Would you...

  1. ... look up the airport online, check the website, and call the airport if you can't find the rates there? or..

  2. ... randomly call limo services on the theory we go to said airport daily and must know.


If your answer was 2, then know that you got a laugh from our office today. The best part is we pay the carriage fee at the airport, and our cars never get close to long-term parking. We're sort of the alternative to going to the airport and parking your car for a week, y'know? We're in and out as fast as possible to increase revenue.

Best part? When I gently suggested the airport website, the person on the other end sounded amazed at the concept.

Oh, and by the way? $15/day. Took me five seconds to find.
gridlore: The word Giants over a baseball (Baseball - SF Giants)
2012-01-31 11:40 pm
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He was beside himself.

I really would love to know the odds of this occurring.

When our drivers pick someone up at the airport, they stand in the appointed place (baggage claim or near the entrance to baggage claim) with a sign saying "Classic Limousine welcomes $PASSENGER_NAME". 9 times out of 10, the passenger sees the sign, walks up , and driver and passenger gather luggage and go to the car, no trouble.

Tonight, two men with identical names came off the same flight and both had reservations with limo services. It wasn't even a common spelling of the first name. Of course, since Murphy loves us, they both went to the wrong driver. Hijinks ensued. Luckily, the drivers were able to sort it out and everyone was laughing about it, but really what are the odds?

Now I get two days off. Thursday I may be up at AT&T Park for the filming of a Giants commercial. Woo!
gridlore: A Roman 20 sided die, made from green stone (Gaming - Roman d20)
2012-01-06 01:52 pm
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Sudden thought

Is a classic RPG dungeon crawl where the characters are forced to follow a set plot with no chance to diverge an Underground Railroad?
gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Goth)
2011-12-22 01:40 pm
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gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (US Flag)
2011-12-06 07:19 pm
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OK, I need to win the lottery for ART!

Everyone remember this?



I want to film people all over the country singing this, with the final being as many people as we can fit on the Capitol steps. Get people from all over. Farmers, cowboys, factory workers, trainees at Fort Benning, a New York cop on traffic duty, cute kids.

I must make it happen.
gridlore: One of the penguins from "Madagascar," captioned "It's all some kind of whacked-out conspiracy." (Penguin - Conspiracy)
2011-12-04 02:51 pm
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gridlore: One of the "Madagascar" penguins with a checklist: [x] cute [x] cuddly [x] psychotic (Penguin - Checklist)
2011-11-11 05:29 pm
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I blame the codeine cough syrup

The Great Gazoo is part of the Q Continuum.

Discuss
gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Kirsten and Me)
2011-10-11 03:54 pm
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gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Gordon is not impressed)
2011-09-14 10:16 am
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Best headline EVER

Gordon Ramsay dwarf porn lookalike eaten by badgers

gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Baseball - Giants animation)
2011-09-04 12:23 pm
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Witness the power of this fully-functional baseball diamond.

It's Star Wars Day at AT&T Park. Tons of people in costume. Looking at the pictures, I came up with what I'd need to do (assuming I had won the lottery at some point.)

Six stormtroopers with the Dodgers logo across their chests. Darth Vader in Dodger Blue with the "LA" logo on his helmet. And the crowning touch, Emperor Palpatine in a dark blue and white robe with LASORDA and a big 2 written across his back.

We'd be booed without mercy, and it would be awesome.
gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Gadsen)
2011-08-30 05:15 pm

Ah, your state government at work.

Had to call EDD about my disability check.. it's supposed to pay twice a month, but there has been fuckery. So, [livejournal.com profile] kshandra zots me the correct page, since she's been there more recently than I, and I call.

Get the usual "For information in English, Press one. Para información en español, por favor, pulse dos." I press one. Where I am immediately told, in English about the toll-free line for Spanish speakers.

Amused me as well.
gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Baseball - Giants animation)
2011-08-17 08:53 pm

AHHHHHhhhhhHHHH!!! The End is NIGH!!!!!

Worldcon slips into an alternate universe!

Yes, that's me in a Dodgers cap. No, I wasn't drunk. No, I didn't lose a bet. I was talking baseball with a Dodgers fan I see at various cons and thought it would be a funny picture.

Or I'm posting from an alternate dimension.

Got to see Dr. Demento live tonight, he is awesome.
gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Default)
2011-08-15 02:53 pm
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"Are you crazy? The fall will probably kill you!"

Rare Manuscript: Butch Cassidy Survived Bolivian Shootout! - Entertainment - The Atlantic Wire

With Hollywood as a guide, you know that legendary outlaw Butch Cassidy died in a blaze of gunfire in 1908 after being chased down in Bolivia and surrounded by cavalry. That established history is being challenged by a rare book collector and author, Brent Ashworth and Larry Pointer, who are enthusiastic about the idea that Cassidy shook free of his pursuers, hightailed it to Europe to get plastic surgery, and then retired to Washington state to pen his memoirs under a pseudonym. And the Associated Press, who reported the imaginative theory, entertains the notion for a bit:

A rare books collector says he has obtained a manuscript with new evidence that may give credence to that theory. The 200-page manuscript, "Bandit Invincible: The Story of Butch Cassidy," which dates to 1934, is twice as long as a previously known but unpublished novella of the same title by William T. Phillips, a machinist who died in Spokane in 1937.


Now in my mind, Butch escaped, mortally wounded, and stumbled upon a Bolivian shaman. Who nursed him back to health and told him the spirits had saved him for a reason. Armed with his skills as gunfighter and brawler mixed with Incan magics, he became The Jaguar, a masked hero of the 20s and 30s before vanishing.
gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Penguin - Stealing Sanity)
2011-08-12 12:30 pm

Ladies and Gentlemen, we're doomed.

I just checked the mail. I am now laughing so hard my teeth may fly out.

As many of you may recall, back in February we registered Darby as non-operational due both my inability to live and our being way broke at the time. When Kirsten filed the renewal, there was some confusion over the insurance; but it was finally determined that a non-operational vehicle didn't need to be covered. Darby sat, being started occasional to keep the fluids moving and the engine alive, until we got the funds together to get me back on the road. Again, when Kiri filed the paperwork at AAA's DMV counter, she took care of the insurance at the same time. I'm legal again, and enjoying life behind the wheel.

Well, today there were two pieces of mail from the fine folks at Dullards, Morons, and Vagabonds. Each was addressed to both of us, because we're both listed as owners. Open the first:

IMPORTANT: YOUR VEHICLE REGISTRATION IS SUSPENDED EFFECTIVE: 05/23/11


Whiskey Tango Foxtrot? I know for a fact we restarted the insurance on Darby, I have the bloody insurance cards in the truck! I start imagining another ordeal with the DMV and having to scrap our two-car plan for Reno. Muttering about the bureaucrats of the City of Dis, I open the second envelope expecting a duplicate form for the other owner. Instead I see:

IMPORTANT: YOUR VEHICLE REGISTRATION IS REINSTATED EFFECTIVE: 08/04/11


I looked. Both letters were generated on August 4th. Oddly, both were mailed on August 10.

This is your government at work. Hail Eris!
gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Me - Glare of Sarcasm)
2011-08-11 02:10 pm
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Ominous Warning or Bad English?

Sign at my local recyclers. This is the same place that has an annual Tet celebration, so that might explain the wording. They're fast, courteous, and professional, so I'll let this pass.

Ominous warning or Bad English?
gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Gordon is not impressed)
2011-08-10 06:53 pm
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gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Atheism - God)
2011-08-08 05:40 pm

Rick Perry’s Jesus Imperative: A Report from Saturday’s Mega-Rally | Politics | Religion Dispatches

Rick Perry’s Jesus Imperative: A Report from Saturday’s Mega-Rally | Politics | Religion Dispatches

By the time Texas Governor Rick Perry took the stage at his scheduled time at The Response on Saturday, the crowd had been softened to receive him. Perry, as scheduled, emerged from behind the prayer and worship band shortly before 11:30, his coiffed hair and toothy grin filling the enormous television screens behind him. The audience, still aglow and groggy, almost, from a frenzied prayer session devoted to individual repentance had been called upon, through the throb of the praise music, to “lay yourselves bare” for Jesus, your “first love,” and to “repent for putting other things before Jesus.”

This was no idle command—in fact “command” and “obedience” were the day’s chief buzzwords for many speakers; as repentance was required on behalf of yourself, your church, and your country for having failed to commit yourself to Jesus, for having permitted abortion and “sexual immorality,” for failing to cleanse yourself of “filthiness,” and to repent for having “touched what is unclean.” As the individual repentance portion of the day reached its climax, just before Perry’s remarks, people lay flat on the floor; others raised their arms in charismatic receipt of God’s word. Others danced. Some spoke in tongues. A woman wearing a fatigue green “M.A.S.H.” t-shirt (that’s Mobile Army Spiritual Hospital) prostrated herself on the floor.

“Like all of you, I love this country this deeply,” intoned the governor who once publicly mused about his state seceding. “Indeed the only thing you love more,” he added, as the audience held its collective breath, praying he wouldn’t say something that fell short of expectations, “is the living Christ.” A collective exhale for him getting it right; the governor was exalted.