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That was exceedingly unpleasant.
Most days, I enjoy riding light rail and walking along the creek trail to get home. Today? Well...
I'm coming off two weeks where I haven't felt overly well. First a stomach bug, then a cold that Kiri and I have been trading back and forth. Today I felt marginally better. Did my shift, grabbed the train, got all the way to Almaden station and across Almaden Expressway when my body sent me a message:
Emergency! Feces Overload Event! Colon Dump Imminent!
I went from feeling fine to gaging how well bushes off the road were sheltered from view in seconds. I started range-walking with a tightly clenched orifice. I had to go about two blocks.
I almost made it. One ruined pair of shorts, a lot of disinfecting Tilex, a hot shower, and a call to Kiri stating that damn right we're doing laundry tonight later and I almost feel human again.
I really have no idea what caused this. I had lunch hours ago (KFC Triple Dip Strips, to which I've become addicted) but usually if lunch is going to bug me, it does it quickly. Hopefully, it was an isolated incident.
I'm coming off two weeks where I haven't felt overly well. First a stomach bug, then a cold that Kiri and I have been trading back and forth. Today I felt marginally better. Did my shift, grabbed the train, got all the way to Almaden station and across Almaden Expressway when my body sent me a message:
Emergency! Feces Overload Event! Colon Dump Imminent!
I went from feeling fine to gaging how well bushes off the road were sheltered from view in seconds. I started range-walking with a tightly clenched orifice. I had to go about two blocks.
I almost made it. One ruined pair of shorts, a lot of disinfecting Tilex, a hot shower, and a call to Kiri stating that damn right we're doing laundry tonight later and I almost feel human again.
I really have no idea what caused this. I had lunch hours ago (KFC Triple Dip Strips, to which I've become addicted) but usually if lunch is going to bug me, it does it quickly. Hopefully, it was an isolated incident.
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Four days later, I'm still having... aftereffects.
Bleah.
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BT,DT
BTDT.....
i feel yo' pain. %-)