gridlore: Doug looking off camera with a grin (Default)
Douglas Berry ([personal profile] gridlore) wrote2006-03-31 09:42 am

Still looking..

While I wait to hear from Blue Sky Cleaners, I'm still poking around. Found a couple of possibilities.

Satellite Installers Wanted

This is an open house. Luckily, we just did some nice copies of my resume.

Material Handler Req# 18-05

This ad is an entire night of buzzword bingo. Take this ALL CAPS bit for example:

DUTIES AND RESPONSIBILITIES INCLUDE THE PRINCIPAL FUNCTIONS OF THE JOB. THE JOB DESCRIPTION SHALL NOT BE CONSTRUED AS A COMPLETE LISTING OF ALL MISCELLANEOUS, INCIDENTAL OR OTHER DUTIES WHICH MAY BE ASSIGNED DURING NORMAL OPERATIONS.


Wouldn't "other duties as required" have done the job just as well?

Mox Nix, since I don't meet the requirements. But do read that ad for the amusement value alone. Dude, it's craigslist! Lighten up a little! Even the ads for lawyers and doctors (yes, we get them) are less formal than that.

And the award for "Ad That Broke the Spell Checker" goes to...

Aqui Cal-Mex Sous Chef

Do the job? I can't even pronounce half of it!

[identity profile] isomeme.livejournal.com 2006-03-31 09:56 pm (UTC)(link)
Satellite Installers Wanted

Do you get to park the Space Shuttle you use to do the installations in front of your apartment after your shift?

[identity profile] gridlore.livejournal.com 2006-03-31 11:07 pm (UTC)(link)
A 0500 liftoff would be a nice revenge on the idiots who wake me up each night...

[identity profile] aurictech.livejournal.com 2006-04-01 12:00 am (UTC)(link)
I was thinking in terms of a really tall ladder.

[identity profile] gridlore.livejournal.com 2006-04-01 12:35 am (UTC)(link)
Nah. Forklift with really good hydraulics.
kengr: (Default)

[personal profile] kengr 2006-04-01 12:52 am (UTC)(link)
Air raft with jatos. :-)

[identity profile] gridlore.livejournal.com 2006-04-01 12:56 am (UTC)(link)
I've had players try that...

(Anonymous) 2006-04-01 01:23 am (UTC)(link)
Pyramid of cheerleaders?

Ooops!

[identity profile] aurictech.livejournal.com 2006-04-01 01:25 am (UTC)(link)
The "pyramid of cheerleaders" comment was mine. I thought I was logged in.
kengr: (Default)

Re: Ooops!

[personal profile] kengr 2006-04-01 05:41 am (UTC)(link)
Unless those cheerleaders are from Krypton, they can't stack high enough to help.

Re: Ooops!

[identity profile] aurictech.livejournal.com 2006-04-01 10:49 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah, I suppose the ones on the bottom would be turned to cheerleader pate before the ones on top would get anywhere near high enough to achieve orbit.

[identity profile] 10binary-cats.livejournal.com 2006-04-01 05:43 am (UTC)(link)
As a tangent to this...imagine what sort of things a 3I version of Mythbusters could get up to. Imagine the explosions...

Jamie Hynemariskillian: Today we're going to investigate the Myth that you can get to orbit with an overdriven gravpogo-stick and attached RATO units.

Buster the crash test Robot: Oh dear.

[identity profile] isomeme.livejournal.com 2006-04-01 01:19 am (UTC)(link)
And a really, really strong throwing arm.

[identity profile] aurictech.livejournal.com 2006-04-01 01:27 am (UTC)(link)
With the ladder option, you might not need a strong throwing arm, if the ladder's tall enough. Just topple the ladder, and let leverage do the rest.... ;-)