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Stupid Winter sports!
Yay, Luge!
During the 2004 Games, I set out my test for what sports should be allowed to remain by way of the Spartan Test
Now it's time to do the Winter Sports. With the Viking Test.
Basically, we ask if a self-respecting fierce Nordic Warrior would take part in this sport. If not, then its out.
On Snow
Biathlon This is so in. Direct application to combat, and it is dangerous.
Alpine Skiing Hurling yourself down a mountain at 80 miles an hour? Very Viking. It's in.
Cross Country Ever hear of the Sissi? It's in.
Freestyle Skiing Real Vikings wouldn't be caught dead doing something called a "helicopter." It's silly. Out.
Nordic Combined Look at the name. It's in.
Snowboarding Vikings wouldn't use a snowboard for anything other than kindling. Out.
Ski Jumping Dangerous unto the point of stupidity. Vikings would love this. In.
On the Track
Bobsleigh Dangerous and fast. Involves teamwork. It's a Viking sport. In.
Luge Like Bobsledding, only even more dangerous. So in.
On the Rink
Curling In, if only for the fact that it involves big rocks.
Figure Skating GONE! No Viking would wear those costumes, and the music? Forget it. Out.
Ice Hockey In. It's fast, violent and emotional.
Speed Skating In, but on probation. They need to make it a bit more exciting.
Short Track Exciting, fast, and unpredictable. In.
During the 2004 Games, I set out my test for what sports should be allowed to remain by way of the Spartan Test
Now it's time to do the Winter Sports. With the Viking Test.
Basically, we ask if a self-respecting fierce Nordic Warrior would take part in this sport. If not, then its out.
On Snow
Biathlon This is so in. Direct application to combat, and it is dangerous.
Alpine Skiing Hurling yourself down a mountain at 80 miles an hour? Very Viking. It's in.
Cross Country Ever hear of the Sissi? It's in.
Freestyle Skiing Real Vikings wouldn't be caught dead doing something called a "helicopter." It's silly. Out.
Nordic Combined Look at the name. It's in.
Snowboarding Vikings wouldn't use a snowboard for anything other than kindling. Out.
Ski Jumping Dangerous unto the point of stupidity. Vikings would love this. In.
On the Track
Bobsleigh Dangerous and fast. Involves teamwork. It's a Viking sport. In.
Luge Like Bobsledding, only even more dangerous. So in.
On the Rink
Curling In, if only for the fact that it involves big rocks.
Figure Skating GONE! No Viking would wear those costumes, and the music? Forget it. Out.
Ice Hockey In. It's fast, violent and emotional.
Speed Skating In, but on probation. They need to make it a bit more exciting.
Short Track Exciting, fast, and unpredictable. In.
no subject
The part done at an ice rink had skating and curling. We had someone manage to get his ankle between two of the stones as they came together.
Didn't break anything but he walked poorly for a few days.