Random rants

[gridlore]

Ripped off from twfarlan
The Random Rant Meme
1. Comment with any subject that you would like me to rant on, with possible swearing involved. Any subject - I don't even have to agree with it.
2. Watch my journal for your rant.
3. Post this in your own journal, so that you may rant for others.

Comments

Re: Know what deserves a rant?

[gridlore.livejournal.com]

OK, my first girlfriend, her family raised chihuahuas. Freaking overgrown rats with a caffeine addiction. There's a reason why I started wearing motorcycle boots in high school! Almost every single day I'd go over to Norma's house, and every single time I'd me attacked by a mob of twitching, yipping dogs. Damn things were too dumb to realize that I was the same guy who had come over at the same time every day for the last year.

I think that's the problem. Little dogs have the cranial spaces normally allocated to hummingbirds, so all they can do is operate three basic commands:

1. Twitch (default setting)

2. Yip uncontrollably (standard reaction to any stimuli)

3. Bite (anything that comes near)

They're frankly too stupid to realize that the thing they are yipping at outmasses them by roughly 200 times. Their tiny little rodent brains can't conceive of the idea that were I to step on them, it would lights out rat dog. I'll I'd have to do is hose off my boot.