Offhand Manor Quote of the Day

"Great, we've got a BASE-jumping teddy bear."

The penguin appears to have become somewhat confused

Confused penguin strays 5,000km

A Magellanic penguin whose natural habitat is the cool climes of southern Chile has strayed thousands of miles from his home, arriving in Peru.

The penguin, native to the Strait of Magellan region of Chile, swam all the way to Peru's Paracas national reserve.

Scientists say the bird appeared to have made the 5,000km (3,000-mile) journey alone.

They say the penguin must have "got off course" to end up just 14 degrees south of the equator.

Damnation! Agent D-714 missed the target! He was supposed to swim to Brazil, infiltrate the Pope's retinue, and gain access to the Vatican Archives!

Water under the bridge. Implement contingency plan "Beebelbrox", send a team to vigorously debrief D-714, and of course we'll need to go forward with the sterilization of every third hamster in Perth Amboy.