ext_46667 ([identity profile] gridlore.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] gridlore 2002-06-11 08:07 pm (UTC)

France, 1944. We peek into the forward headquarters of the 532nd Panzergrenadier Regiment, locked in combat with Patton's advancing forces. Colonel Schonauer leans over his maps as Hauptman Leiber enters.

Leiber: "Colonel! Our center has collapsed! The verdamnit Amis are using pictures of fluffy kittens! Our cute little bunny pictures cannot compete, there are just too many of them!"

Schonauer: "Tell them they must hold! 2nd battalion is the lynch pin of our defense. If we fall, Paris falls!"

Leiber: "May we expect support, Herr Colonel?"

Schonauer: "Nein. The 8th Air Force made massive teddy bear strikes all through our rear areas. Traffic is snarled all the way to Belgium."

A whistling noise risies to a roar, followed by an explosion. Both officers dive for cover.

Schonauer: "That was too close, Hauptman, I... Hey! Beanie Babies! They have 'Prickles the Hedgehog!' Und 'Quack the Duck, und. . ."

Leiber (horrified) "Mein Gott, the war is lost."

From The Cute Road To Victory, 1947</

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