Some call me...
Literal meaning
"The doctors say we should try to raise it as a girl and see how things go."
History
The sole sound that could be made by a mysterious blank-faced man found wandering the streets of Paris in a rush, the name Douglas was originally used monotonously to refer to warriors who died during drill practice, before employing some marketing people to give it a more youthful image.
Famous Douglases
1. Douglas Quoits-Ach, who's never forgotten the hovering cinema; last holder of the office of Last Out of the Building When the Fire-Alarm Rings;
2. Douglas Endeavour, opponent of paroxysms of fright;
3. Douglas U Sprokes, belittler of static electricity; ghost-writer of Yootha Joyce's expressionist autobiography, I WAS MONTY'S THUG; first holder of the office of Evil Marionette;
4. Douglas Marl-Boonk, who lost a fortune on the nightmare cupboard;
5. Douglas Tube, PhD, aroused by several of the more violent gypsy curses;
6. Douglas Trabmaw ("The Reasonably Broadly Educated"), exposed in the press as having swapped a child for Explode-O, the wonder bang dismantler; ghost-writer of Lionel Stander's agonisingly graphic autobiography, I'M FEELING QUEASY, GEOFFREY; first holder of the office of Lord Mayor's Official Stenciller;
7. I Am Douglas W Oily, MD, RN, co-writer of INDIANA JONES AND HALF-MAN HALF-BISCUIT GO HULA; first holder of the office of Mr & Miss Transsexual World;
8. Douglas O'S'Ess-Jesus, champion of a nice cup of tea;
9. Douglas P Tightbadger, MSc, named in court as holding compromising material concerning Evap-o-Floor;
10. Inspector Douglas Dindymene, who could never shake an early association with the early career of Roy Clarke.
Typical Douglas motto
"London's burning and I live by the river."