I know it's hard to have these discussions, but it's good to do so as well. I had them with my sister (to my left in the icon photo) and we put them in writing, although annoyingly, California regulations about durable medical powers of attorney for people in nursing homes meant that we never formally concluded it. However, when the doctors called me while I was in Dublin — and am I glad I got a Irish "burner" phone and changed my US number's greeting to tell people what it would be so they could reach me ‐ they weren't concerned about the technicalities. Everyone involved agreed that Kelli had given me the decision, and that she and I had talked it over. So when the time came, I was the one who had to say, "keep her from suffering," and she died a few days later. It's not easy, but it's less difficult when you've had the conversations before the crisis comes.